i can't sleep.
my brain won't quit mulling over all the things i could have done better when i taught ballet at rohanna dance productions. i was there only one year. i started out teaching only 2 or 3 shorter classes, but when one of the main ballet instructors left, i had the opportunity to step in and take care of her classes.
and i feel like i dropped the ball.
there were a few small successes, and i felt like i was able to help a couple of the students really learn and grow. but as a whole, i feel like i could have done SO much better! i hate that feeling!
true, it was the hardest year of my life, personally. really, unbelievably hard. but still, i wish i had rebounded better from that, and learned faster from my mistakes as a teacher.
i'm sorry for the time i called troop 2/3 "babies" when they were whining about a particularly challenging combination i asked them to do. what i should have said was, "come on, guys, you can totally do it. i have complete confidence in you." because that's what i meant. i should have taken a lot more care with my words.
i'm sorry for being so super hard on troop 4. i was SO concerned about teaching them discipline and responsibility, that i forgot to let them have fun. and i forgot about grace. how could i forget about grace?!?! i also forgot how much discipline they were already demonstrating, just by giving up almost all of their free time to be at the dance studio.
i'm sorry for when i lost my patience with my littlest (and cutest) ones - troop 1. i forgot to let kids be kids.
i wish so much that i could do it over again. i KNOW i could do better, and serve those girls better.
well, if any of you girls read this, know that i think of you often, and that i did (and still do) care about you, even when it didn't show. i hope your teachers are encouraging you and challenging you, so that you grow as dancers and as young women.
live and learn, right?
tales of the clarks, as told by heather.
- team clark
- maryland
- heather and daniel (a.k.a. team clark) were married on the happy day of may 30, 2008. they love spinach artichoke dip, reminiscing, and "the office"
read it and weep
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Reflections on a year in France14 years ago
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Clare Look-a-likes12 years ago
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Coming to a close13 years ago
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Sanctity of Life and Infant Adoption8 years ago
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We’ve moved!10 years ago
5 comments:
You are learning and growing just as much as the kids are, Heather. If you decide to try for another dance instructor position, you will be able to say that you have really, really learned a lot about how to work with small children, including what is effective for them and what is not.
Maybe there is an instructor in your community who would let you mentor with her for a while and practice what you have learned while you look for your next opportunity? Just thinking out loud here.
Best wishes for whatever is to come.
Thanks so much for your thoughts and encouragement =)
Heather,
I have the same kind of regrets about my semester in Spain and the time I spent working in Mexico. I was so homesick that I never fully engaged with the people I met there and I don't think I completely opened my heart for God to show me things he wanted to teach me. It makes me sad to think back on it now, but I can't change it, so I guess we just move on and use what we learned, right? :)
Heather, on behalf of cute ballerinas everywhere (not that I am one).. I forgive you! :) Be Free! I do hope you have truly forgiven yourself. I certainly have many teaching moments that I know I could have done better and wish for a "re-do" button... but, thankfully, God is bigger than our mistakes. I'm sure you gave them a lot of GOOD stuff, too. (Like, when you taught me to "turn out" :)). And, even though we forget grace sometimes, God never does! so, Grace on you, friend!
thanks for sharing :)
lindsay and melissa, you are good and wise friends =) love you!
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